{"id":656,"date":"2020-10-15T19:14:44","date_gmt":"2020-10-15T19:14:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=656"},"modified":"2020-10-15T19:59:19","modified_gmt":"2020-10-15T19:59:19","slug":"in-my-head","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=656","title":{"rendered":"In My Head"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed-youtube wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"In My Head\" width=\"819\" height=\"461\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/M7DpsWj7AHM?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<em>I went by your house last night to see what I could do<br>To rectify the wrongs I done to you<br>The air was still, the sky, a lake, of black above my head<br>I watched you there. Your window wore my breath<\/em>\n\n\n\n<p>I picture a man who looks a little bit like me walking a wooded path on a dark, clear, cool night. He reaches a familiar house and watches through the window as the woman he loves washes dishes inside. With an unspeakable ache in his heart, he imagines what could have been.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<em>I touch your face. I touch your shoulder.<br>The words they flow like the ones the poets said.<br>And then we walk down through the garden<br>Down the path few lovers dare to tread<br>Happy ever after in my head<\/em>\n\n\n\n<p>I don\u2019t remember the actual writing of this song. It\u2019s one of those gifts that just sort of fall out of the ether. One minute it\u2019s not there. The next minute it\u2019s there, feeling like it\u2019s been there forever. I live for those songs and pay close attention when they come.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<em>I had scribbled down some thoughts and had them tucked inside my shirt<br>How angry waters don\u2019t care who they hurt.<br>Oh my sweating, scarred, unsteady hand went reaching for your door<br>But I forgot what I was reaching for<\/em>\n\n\n\n<p>When I used to sing that \u201cangry waters\u201d line, I\u2019d note how unlike the character in the song I was. I\u2019ve since realized, especially over the past couple of years, that I was <em>exactly<\/em> like him: carried by \u201cangry waters;\u201d willfully ignorant of the powerful forces within me; hurting many along the way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<em>Time stands still and cries forgiveness<br>The words they flow like the ones the poets said<br>And then we walk down through the garden<br>Along the path few lovers dare to tread<br>Happy ever after in my head<\/em>\n\n\n\n<p>Did he ever find his voice and cry forgiveness?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Did he start to back away but then stop, swallow his fear and his pride and his pain, rush to the front door and knock?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And when she answered, did she see something new in his eyes? Or was it something old he had almost forgotten?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Did his tears of remorse and remembering transform those angry waters into something new?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I vote yes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-9d6595d7 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p style=\"font-size:30px\"> Archives<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><a href=\"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=652\" data-type=\"page\" data-id=\"652\">Start Again &#8211; 10\/9\/2020<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=642\" data-type=\"page\" data-id=\"642\">Morning Sounds &#8211; 10\/2\/2020<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=632\" data-type=\"page\" data-id=\"632\">Saint Jude &#8211; 9\/25\/2020<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=622\" data-type=\"page\" data-id=\"622\">1970s &#8211; 9\/18\/2020<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=610\" data-type=\"page\" data-id=\"610\">Blue Sky Song &#8211; 9\/11\/2020<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/?page_id=24\" data-type=\"page\" data-id=\"24\">Midnight Ghost &#8211; 9\/4\/2020<\/a><\/li><\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I went by your house last night to see what I could doTo rectify the wrongs I done to youThe air was still, the sky, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-656","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/656","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=656"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/656\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":661,"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/656\/revisions\/661"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/billdeasy.com\/wp\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=656"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}